Why Perfectionism Can Be Harmful
There is a lot of discussion on the “whys” of perfectionism. What you’re about to read will provide you with all the facts you need to understand why this ‘thing’ might be detrimental to us.
What happens when you hold yourself to an unrealistic standard? You end up spending your life constantly terrified of failing at anything. This is something I’m guilty of. I’m sure you are as well. It occurs to me on a daily basis. And it’s not good for you. When you are a perfectionist, you attempt to do so much that you will never be able to do anything correctly. Not only that, but if you fail at anything, you will continuously feel bad. You will get nervous, agitated, and sad as a result of putting so much pressure on yourself to achieve. In reality, the stress that comes with striving for perfection frequently leads to poor judgments. In the long term, this aggravates the situation.
This has long been considered a character fault. However, it is more frequent than ever in today’s culture. So, what is it about perfectionism that holds individuals back? And what are we going to do about it?
The Psychology of Perfectionism:
Perfectionism is a major issue. In fact, according to a recent American Psychological Association research, the term “perfection” is one of the most prevalent reasons why individuals fail. So many individuals strive hard to attain a goal but get so caught up in the “perfection” element of the objective that they never reach it.
While perfectionism is an inherent human characteristic, it can be crippling if it dominates you. It’s an all-or-nothing mentality. The individual who feels they are incapable of doing anything effectively or correctly will feel inadequate at every step. It has the potential to destroy your day.
According to the study, perfectionism is often based on early experiences. A parent’s expectations, whether reasonable or not, may influence a child’s worldview. You may have learned that it is tough to excel in school if your parents did not demand much of you in school. If your parents were unconcerned about your weight, you may have realized that eating healthy is difficult and would just lead to disappointment if you fail. In either case, the lesson is that success is difficult. And it’s not right. Perfectionism is born, and it is difficult to let go.
Perfectionism is a Double-Edged Sword:
Perfectionism is a two-edged sword. If you are very perfectionistic, you will find it difficult to enjoy doing things because you believe you must do everything exactly. Sometimes we believe that we are not good enough and that we are not deserving of happiness. It is important to remember that pleasure does not result from perfection. It comes from being ourselves and doing the things we love.
It is critical to understand that perfection is an illusion. There is no such thing as a flawless individual. We are all flawed in some way. We are all flawed. This is why you should never compare yourself to others. Each of us has unique talents and shortcomings. Some individuals are more motivated than others. Some individuals have greater self-control than others. Some individuals have better creative abilities than others. You must understand that everyone of us has a unique personality and set of skills.
The Pressure to Be Perfect:
Perfectionism is characterized as being too preoccupied with one’s own defects and shortcomings. People with high degrees of perfectionism are often self-critical and too sensitive to errors. When you consider perfectionists, you will see that they have a difficult time receiving criticism. To them, making a mistake signifies that you are a bad person or that you are ignorant.
In other words, perfectionists believe they are superior to everyone else. They are not particularly accepting of other people’s viewpoints. Because perfectionists have a hard time accepting failure, this may be incredibly stressful. They often place a lot of pressure on themselves to be flawless and have high expectations of themselves. However, if they do not fulfill expectations, they are dissatisfied and believe they have failed.
Perfectionism Can Lead To Anxiety And Depression:
Anxiety, despair, guilt, and humiliation may all be caused by perfectionism. In general, perfectionists are nervous people who, if they don’t reach their objectives, are prone to feel melancholy. Because they have unreasonable expectations, they feel unprepared, unappreciated, and worried.
When you set a goal for yourself, it is important to be realistic about it. When you have unrealistic expectations, you will feel dissatisfied when they are not met. For example, if you anticipate losing 20 pounds in one week, you may only drop 3 to 5 pounds. You may believe that you failed, but in truth, you performed well. You will be happy with your achievement if you keep your expectations modest.
In fact, some individuals refer to these folks as “pessimists.” Being a pessimist, though, does not preclude you from aiming high. It simply implies that you should not have unrealistic expectations.
Perfectionism Can Hinder Creativity And Productivity
Perfectionism may be a significant cause of stress, and it has even been shown to reduce productivity. A perfectionist who becomes fixated on a single job or work might burn out, lose concentration, and create a negative feedback loop that sends you in circles.
If you believe that you will never be flawless, you may be able to do more, but this does not imply that you will ever be perfect. Everyone has restrictions. We can’t do it all at once.
To be effective, we must first recognize that we are not flawless and will make errors. Focusing on our abilities and overcoming our flaws is the key to productivity.
Perfectionism Can Damage Relationships:
Perfectionism may be detrimental to your life. For example, you may find it difficult to enjoy relationships because you are always worrying about something. That implies you’re continually striving for perfection. People despise perfectionists. In fact, if you are overly preoccupied with being flawless, you may find it difficult to connect to others. People who are always striving for perfection are not enjoyable to be around. They might also be irritating to be around since they refuse to make errors.
They often go out of their way to satisfy others. This leads people to strive for perfection all of the time. This might irritate people. These folks are frequently too critical and expect a lot from others. They are impatient with other people. They want individuals to perform flawlessly. When others do not obey their guidelines, they have no compassion. This makes them seem cruel. They believe that everyone is foolish and uninformed.
The Fear of Failure:
Perfectionists are often afraid of failure. As a result, they may shun new experiences or difficulties.
If you are concerned about being flawless, you will undoubtedly fail. Perfection does not exist, and you should never expect yourself to be flawless. Nobody is flawless. Nobody will be able to do all they set out to do. You will almost certainly fail at some things. It makes no difference if you are an athlete, an actress, or a CEO. Some things will go wrong for you. Some may believe that accepting failure is bad; however, failing is a part of life. Nobody is impervious to failure. Failure is an unavoidable occurrence. It is a natural part of existence.
Failure is only a means of teaching us to work harder and wiser the following time. You may learn from your mistakes and use what you’ve learned to become a better person and achieve more in life. In reality, you may use failure to push you and help you succeed.
If you are serious about excelling in life, you should not wait for the ideal moment. You should do it anytime you have the opportunity.
The Cost of Perfectionism:
In a nutshell, perfectionism may be emotionally and physically draining. It might cause individuals to feel overwhelmed and worried.
They are so obsessed with completing things correctly that they often overwork themselves. In reality, they may end up putting themselves in risk. When you attempt to accomplish too much, you may get ill and have a heart attack.
You might injure yourself if you are not cautious. Furthermore, being a perfectionist may lead you to lose sight of what you really want in life.
How to Overcome Perfectionism?
There are several approaches to overcoming perfectionism. One method is to progressively become more tolerant of your shortcomings and failures. Begin by admitting that perfectionism is not a healthy way of life. It is important to recognize that you cannot always be flawless and that errors are a natural part of life. Forgive yourself and move on when you make a mistake.
Second, create attainable objectives for yourself. Don’t strive to do everything all at once; instead, divide your objectives into smaller chunks to make them easier to attain.
Finally, the idea of perfectionism is something we all fight with at various points in our lives. We may believe that in order to be deemed successful, we must “do things exactly” or “be perfect.” But it isn’t feasible. Perfectionism is counterproductive, particularly in life, relationships, and work. Even if you can’t accomplish everything flawlessly, “good enough” is preferable to average.
Not only is perfectionism a psychological trap that may lead to dissatisfaction and sadness, but it can also prevent us from enjoying the life we desire. Let go of the shame of not achieving your objectives and instead enjoy the trip!
References:
https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2022/03/parental-expectations-perfectionism
https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/379944
https://www.craftyourcontent.com/perfectionism-destroys-productivity/
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